Entry 5: Ordinary

This is a poem I wrote 2 years ago for my freshman English Class. I recently found it and reread it. 

Ordinary

On the outside I may seem strong

Never scared

Never hurt

But on the inside

I’m full of doubts

Worries

Fear

And

Hurt, from the way you treat others

On the surface I may seem happy

But deep within I am saddened

By the way you talk about me

The words you use

And how you describe my family

On the outside I am confident

But underneath I am scared

Scared of the unknown

Scared of messing up

Scared of looking like a fool

Scared of never being excepted

Excepted by you

By this world

Some times I feel like I am

On the other side of a window

Looking in

But never receiving

On the surface I may look like you

With my hair straightened

And make up done

With my en-expensive wardrobe

And my fairly white teeth

Brown hair, brown eyes

But within I’m nowhere near like you

I care about my body

And what I do with it

I use my words for build-ups

Not knock-you-downs

On the surface I may seem ordinary

Plain

Dull

Nothing new

But that’s all that you see.

That’s not me.

Underneath; as I peel off the layers

Like coming in from the cold

I begin to show you who I am

Make it clear to you

That I am not

Nor will I ever be

ORDINARY!

For I am ME